"It’s 2am and I’m thinking about love.
I’m thinking about the possibility that someone could make this world seem a little less dark to me, moving from thinking of them as just another human to a city you want to spend as much time exploring as possible, a vacation spot you could get lost in and not bother asking for directions because to you, there’s something amazing at every turn.
It’s 2am and I’m thinking about love.
I’m thinking about making special files in my mind for her for all of the little things like the way she takes her coffee, her favorite places to go when the weather’s nice and which one of my hoodies she’d like to steal the most.
It’s 2am and I’m thinking about love.
I’m thinking about things like the way I shiver when I get nervous and whether or not she’ll find that attractive.
Things like how often I’d be on my knees in prayer, thanking God for creating a masterpiece that until recently I could only ever fantasize about laying my eyes upon.
It’s 2am and I’m thinking about love.
I’m thinking about the possibility of her being awake at a time like this and thinking about the same things I am, thinking about how nice it would be to have someone who makes all of the storms in life seem less terrifying.
It’s 2am and now..I’m afraid of love.
I’m afraid of the idea that one day, I could be remembering all of this, instead of actually living it.
The idea that my heart will end up more broken than it already is.
It’s 2am and now I’m afraid of love.
I’m afraid of seeing her in every store window, in every mirror, in every phone screen and not being sure what I see when I manage to see myself.
It’s 2am and now I’m afraid of love.
I’m afraid of the one who was supposed to help me weather the storms becoming the biggest storm I ever face, the only storm I could never truly escape.
It’s 2am and now I’m afraid of love.
I’m afraid of replaying the memories of the time we spend together like a highlight reel, with closing my eyes at random times becoming a habit because the only place I can see her now is behind my eyelids.
It’s 2am and now..I’m not afraid of love.
I’m afraid of loving and losing.
"
It’s 2am and I’m thinking about love.
I’m thinking about the possibility that someone could make this world seem a little less dark to me, moving from thinking of them as just another human to a city you want to spend as much time exploring as possible, a vacation spot you could get lost in and not bother asking for directions because to you, there’s something amazing at every turn.
It’s 2am and I’m thinking about love.
I’m thinking about making special files in my mind for her for all of the little things like the way she takes her coffee, her favorite places to go when the weather’s nice and which one of my hoodies she’d like to steal the most.
It’s 2am and I’m thinking about love.
I’m thinking about things like the way I shiver when I get nervous and whether or not she’ll find that attractive.
Things like how often I’d be on my knees in prayer, thanking God for creating a masterpiece that until recently I could only ever fantasize about laying my eyes upon.
It’s 2am and I’m thinking about love.
I’m thinking about the possibility of her being awake at a time like this and thinking about the same things I am, thinking about how nice it would be to have someone who makes all of the storms in life seem less terrifying.
It’s 2am and now..I’m afraid of love.
I’m afraid of the idea that one day, I could be remembering all of this, instead of actually living it.
The idea that my heart will end up more broken than it already is.
It’s 2am and now I’m afraid of love.
I’m afraid of seeing her in every store window, in every mirror, in every phone screen and not being sure what I see when I manage to see myself.
It’s 2am and now I’m afraid of love.
I’m afraid of the one who was supposed to help me weather the storms becoming the biggest storm I ever face, the only storm I could never truly escape.
It’s 2am and now I’m afraid of love.
I’m afraid of replaying the memories of the time we spend together like a highlight reel, with closing my eyes at random times becoming a habit because the only place I can see her now is behind my eyelids.
It’s 2am and now..I’m not afraid of love.
I’m afraid of loving and losing.
- maxwelldpoetry, “2am Thoughts #1” (via wnq-writers)
Via wordsnquotes - Oct 20, 2015
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